On women as sexual objects, and street harassment.
I wasn’t going to write about this.. but you know what. I changed my mind.
So the other night, Molly and I were out and about in DC after Awesome Con, walking to the bar with 4 of our fellow (male) convention goers. We were on a relatively quiet residential street, walking, laughing and minding our own business.
As we kept walking we approached a group of men, 3 of them to be exact, walking in the opposite direction we were headed, as we got closer everyone started to file on to one side of the side walk so the others could pass. I happened to be at the end of our group of people. Still laughing and talking we passed this group of men and suddenly one of them reached out and very much ON PURPOSE grabbed me. Grabbed me right between my legs. I was so shocked I half “What the fuck-ed” turned and made eye contact with this man and was given a look that very much read “Yeah, I just did that” and he smiled. His friends laughed.
I kept walking.
Molly and Adam (someone I just met, mind you.) asked me what happened and I said “That man just grabbed me!” in a very stunned voice.
And they asked me where. All while I kept walking. (I wanted to get as much distance between myself and those men as possible.) I told them where. Some in our group had already been drinking so the drunken “Where is he! I’ll fight him!” comments were made.
I just kept walking.
Adam put his arm around my shoulders. Molly kept asking if I was ok. I had to swallow down tears. But I assured everyone I was ok.
I kept telling everyone to keep walking.
Because I was scared. Because I didn’t want anything else to happen. Because I felt like I didn’t have any control over my own situation.
Do you understand why I get up in arms over women being depicted as sexual objects and nothing else?
Because it makes men think they can grab women on the street and smile at her when she says “WHAT THE FUCK?”
Because it makes men think a woman wearing a short skirt is an invitation for sex. (To clarify, when I was grabbed, I was wearing jeans and hoodie. Not that that FUCKING MATTERS.) So they rape her and tell her it was caused by her actions.
Because all these “art forms” actually do have real world and real life consequences, and I am tired of being silent and scared of all the bull shit I see perpetuated over and over again.